Tuesday, January 31, 2006

The Power, the Power, bwahahahahah!

First let me tell you that absolutely no knitting was done yesterday, which is probably just as well. My hand has improved immensely and only hurts a little bit. The brace has definitely helped along with the knitting rest.

I know this is my own damn fault. I've always suffered from an excess of enthusiasm for crafts. Just visiting a yarn store or craft store has always had fairly embarrassing effects on my physical state of being which I refuse to discuss here. So, naturally I must throw myself into knitting with reckless abandon, with the result that I injured myself doing it. So stupid, really. I may already be sidelined from the Knitting Olympics if I can't get over this!

At this point, though, I'm contemplating trying to improve my gauge when knitting continental. I'm a loose knitter knitting English style, so that I usually have to go down a needle size to achieve correct gauge, but knitting continental...then I need to go down two to three needle sizes because I'm ultra loose! But if I knit continental I won't be using that forefinger/thumb pincer position that is probably the cause of my particular repetitive motion injury. I just can't stand purling continental because I've never gotten the hang of it. Maybe it's time to get out a skein of junky yarn and just start practicing....sigh.

In the meantime, I will knit with the brace on, as horrible as that is. Are you feeling sorry for me yet? If not, you have a heart of stone. Don't laugh! I can hear you laughing!

But on to the topic which heads this post....THE POWER!!!

Today my kids' school had Crazy Hat day (plus mismatched shoes.) I have the perfect hat for them to wear for this. Look at it! It's the Debbie Bliss Christmas Tree hat from Heads, Hands & Toes! Isn't it perfect? I spent $35 just for the BUTTONS for this hat! I knit it when Laurel was 4 years old (making this hat 7 years old.) Back then, I think she wore it ONCE. I paid $35 just for the buttons for a hat she only wore ONCE. I'll pause to let that sink in...

So you think that SOMEONE would love to wear this hat for Crazy Hat day, right? It is crazy, right? So why would no one volunteer to wear it today, not even the Squatter? It did not make any sense to me, so you know what? I put it on and wore it myself!

"Erm...Mother!" Laurel said. (You know you are in trouble when your tweenage daughter calls you "Mother"!) "You're not going to get out of the car, are you?"

Oh, the POWER!! I have finally reached that stage that all parents hope and dream for, the power to EMBARRASS their children!

My children have been embarrassing me in public regularly for years, so now it's PAYBACK TIME!!!

"Not only might I get out of the car," I said, "I might just go into the school and show everyone my hat!"

"Noooooooooo!!!!" All three children exploded into cries of horror at the thought of their mother walking into school with a Christmas tree hat on her head. It was a sweet moment and I savored it.

"People will laugh at you!" the Squatter exclaimed. I explained that once you get to be my age, what people think of you simply ceases to matter as much and you don't mind being laughed at. At age 7, he's just beginning to get the idea that being laughed at isn't always the great thing it is when you are 5.

Somehow, the fact that I would not be embarrassed at all by people laughing at the spectacle of a 44 year old woman wearing a Christmas tree hat did not improve the prospect of the same for my kids. So I relented and simply dropped them off at school. No one could see my hat in the car...sigh.

I thought about showing the people at Starbucks my hat as I stopped for my Caramel Macchiato, but I decided they just wouldn't get it. But you do, don't you?

Do you think I should wear it when I pick them up? I have to get out of the car to do that! Or should the threat of embarrassment be enough without the deed itself? Bwahahahahah!


Mary said...

Love the hat! Go for it! You have years of embarrasing your kids ahead of you. Then, they'll reach the age (like my 21 year old son) when they decide if you want to go out of the house "looking THAT way", it is your problem. Live each day to the fullest and if it means giving others a smile from a silly hat, that is great.

megan said...

thats a great hat! i love how it is shaped and all. keep up the awesome work!

Bonny Babe said...

Brilliant! I love your hat! I think you should send me your hat so I can embarrass my niece [my daughter isn't quite there yet]. I will take a picture of me in said hat and then mail it back to you along with the embarrassing story and pic. Who knows, you could start a whole movement [like the traveling nome or red paperclip thing] except it would be the "Humiliating Holiday Hat"!